LOVING YOURSELF | tips that work

hi everyone it’s live today I’m going to be doing a little bit of a different video and as you can see from the title it is about self-love or how to like yourself I’m actually really fortunate in that I’ve never had an eating disorder or I’ve never acquired certain behaviors as a way of punishing myself I’m really really lucky to have never gone through any of that and I think it’s because I’ve had pretty I don’t want to say realistic but just like logical approach to myself I guess today I just want to talk about things that I have done to get to where I am today into a position of actually you know respecting myself and seeing myself as valuable and all of that I wrote it down in a book so that I wouldn’t forget any of my points so you see me looking down that’s why here are some tips on what I have done and what I currently do to like not bash myself and to just hold myself to a higher standard and to actually like myself I’m not saying that you know you should be cocky and conceited and anything like that that’s not what I mean at all but I think a lot of people you know expect other people to like them but they can’t even like themselves or they expect other people to respect them but they don’t even respect themselves and that’s I think where the problem lies okay so my first number one tip is I’m sure you’ve heard lots of people say get rid of your scale and that’s because a lot of people have like an obsession with weighing themselves and I hundred percent understand that scales like play this weird numbers game with your head so if you not do that but what I think is also important is to get rid of your full-length mirror I’ve had a full-length mirror in my room since I was like I don’t know probably 14 or 15 and I understand it’s really practical like you can see what your outfit looks like or how you look in something but I noticed that when i had a full-length mirror in my room every time i would walk by it or every time I’d catch my reflection I kind of look at it and scrutinize it and and think things about it you know it was over in that corner over there across from my bed and so when I wake up in the morning I’ll look in the mirror and be like Oh God look at my stomach or whatever I was thinking that day and so I just decided one day I was like why do I even have this in like in my room I don’t need it I don’t it’s not necessary so I took it out of my room and I just put it in the other room behind a door and I was like if I need to look in it then I’ll just go look at what my hope it looks like or see if there’s you know anything i’m back my pants or whatever but that was probably about a year ago actually and i haven’t moved it back into my room and I rarely use it when it’s out there as of now like I I don’t see my reflection that much unless it’s from you know shoulders up in my other mirror that I have it has helped so much I just found I was wasting so much time in my day every time I would see myself I would like look at myself and you know just like scrutinize what I saw and that’s so pointless like why would you be wasting your time like looking at your reflection like just get rid of your mirror it’s taking up so much of your time it’s not helpful whatsoever you don’t need to look at yourself that much my second tip is to stop putting down other women and actually just stop commenting on their physical appearance at all a lot of people actually without realizing it like your schooling scrolling through Instagram and you see a picture of someone all of these thoughts start coming in before you even consciously think about them and obviously if they’re negative thoughts and your constantly putting other women down saying oh look at her why is she doing that why should making that face why did she post this that’s clearly not beneficial to anyone else especially not to yourself it kind of makes you feel like other people are doing that to you or you start doing that when you see pictures of yourself that just starts a whole cycle of bad thought patterns if you find yourself just comparing yourself to people is to just like stop commenting on their appearance at all so even if you look at her and you’re like wow her body so great like she looks so good even though you’re saying nice things about that person and you’re not technically doing anything wrong you’re still making yourself feel like like you’re so comparing yourself to that and you’re still thinking like oh she has a great body compared to what I have or she has a great body compared to other bodies that I’ve seen that aren’t as good and I think that that is just really harmful especially if you’re trying to you know be more loving towards yourself just stop commenting on people at all if you see someone walked by and you say to your friend she had huge boobs it’s like who cares like you just stop looking at people and commenting on them just about their body why would you be you know feeling bad about how they look when you look good to you just look different obviously give compliments to people but if you know what I mean like I think you know where the line is between like giving someone a compliment here and there and like constantly keep with every person you see just like letting this wave insecurities hit you you know okay the next one is to stop commenting on your own body this one is something that I found really difficult but I was actually talking to my sister recently and we’re just saying how you know you have those friends where you take a picture with them and then you know you flip your phone around the first thing they say is it oh my god don’t post that like no I look so bad ooh and it’s like they have this reaction to themselves where they’re disgusted then you you have that one friend who’s actually like okay with how they look or and you take a picture with them and they look and they go oh that’s so nice what a cute picture whenever that used to happen to me I’d be like what why do you you actually like how you look in this like what you’re allowed to like how you look in photo and I never understood that and my sister and I were thinking like why aren’t more people just like you’re not going to look perfect in every picture like it’s so crazy to us that you know people can look at a picture and just go like oh my god you and just have this like immediate reaction of disgust it’s like what the hell like why why are you reacting like that I think it just takes practice to be able to see a picture of yourself and seeing the other things in it like is it a picture with your best friend who you haven’t seen in a long time like notice the other things about the picture other than just yourself and you’ll start to realize that you really like the photo a lot more so I’ve I’ve sort of turned into the person that is you know sees a picture and they go all that so cute because I realized that you know in 10 years you’re gonna look back on the picture and you’re not gonna go oh my god I look so terrible you’re probably going to say oh like look how young I was that’s so sweet you know that was my best friend in high school I miss her you’re not gonna be thinking like oh my God look at my thighs you’re not gonna think that at all if you change your media reaction to something then it can just overall help you with yourself love another thing that I do is if I you know catch a glimpse of myself or look down and I see like the role of fat on my stomach and I’m like oh my stomach so big I’ll stop myself like right after that first thought hits and I’ll just close my eyes I’ll take a deep breath and I say in my head not allowed stop and I just like I say the word and I just stop all those thoughts because I know as soon as that one thought comes then it’s like this wave of them will just come it’s like opening the floodgates and all these terrible thoughts start coming and it’s like oh I really should have worked out I shouldn’t have eaten that whatever you don’t realize how much of like a string of thoughts will happen in such a short amount of time until you start stopping yourself after the first one or in the middle of the first one or before you even have thought so it’s a really good practice to get into to just start you know take a deep breath and just say stop and then go do something else so the reason why I say go do something else is because normally if you’re doing something that you love or you’re doing something that you have to or like you’re just doing something productive you don’t have time to just sit around and like whine about how you look at the last 1i have the last point I have is to stop caring about clothing sizes I know that this is a really hard because when you see like weight loss shows that they’re like she went from a size 12 to a size 8 in whatever and it’s like that means nothing sizes vary from country to country so it’s not like I’m going to look at a pair of you know my size four pants here and then in Europe emphasize what like 36 and be like oh my god I’m a size 36 but imma size for hip no you just know that the sizes are different so why is it that people get upset when they’re in one store and they’re medium and then they go to the next door and they have to get a pair of pants in a large or something like it’s just a way for them to differentiate between the clothing and for you to know like this shirt is smaller than this shirts I’ve seen people like you know they try on a size and then it’s like they say oh I need a size up in that and they get all embarrassed and ashamed or upset about it and it’s like why would you get upset you’re ever trying on clothes you’re going to change your room you’ll find yourself getting upset about going up a size not fitting into the size you thought you were going to who cares it’s just a size on a piece of clothing I don’t really focus too much on the size of things because I’ve stuff in my closet that’s an extra small that’s like really stretchy fabric that happened to fit me and then I also have something that’s a large and I don’t really label myself by like the size of clothes that I fit into yeah those are the things that I followed throughout my life like you know some of them more than others in certain parts of my life but I think that’s why I have such a logical and rational outlook on how I see myself when it comes down to it you honestly are all you have if you don’t love yourself then like who’s going to you know there’s no other choice your life kind of depends on it seems really sad and kind of depressing but it’s true there are no dress rehearsals in life I know it sounds cliche like you know love yourself now but focus on doing things that promote you feeling better about yourself and you like in yourself because in the end you’re the one who’s going to benefit from it so why wouldn’t you want to do it ok so those are all my thoughts on that well not all dumb definitely not all though there’s some of my thoughts on this topic and I want to know what you guys think about this because I think it’s one of the biggest problems that I think most women and a lot of men face is that they just spend too much time hating on themselves and they don’t realize that you’re actually allowed to like yourself that is what I’m hoping to start a conversation about with this video um I will see you guys next time for another recipe video and if you haven’t already make sure you subscribe so that you can see all my videos when they first come out I will see you next you

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